Less Than Three

For those of you that don't know, less than three is the long way of saying "love."  It's computer speak.  It's shorthand - <3.  A heart.
My friend Meggie pointed me to a blog post (via Twitter!) that was titled the same thing as my blog post right now.**  And it got me thinking...

This women's post was fabulous.  Amazing.  I loved that she did it.  And I wanted to do it too.  I have so many things that I love.  Sometimes it helps just to list them out.  So I did, and they are in no particular order:

• Ice, cold Diet Cokes
• My ever-present companions - heating blankets at night, protectors by day, snoring little mischievious devils - Bobo and Tucker
• Things that are made in crockpots
• Starbucks - standard Skinny Vanilla Latte order, and the seasonal specialties of Pumpkin Spice and White Chocolate Peppermint
• The invention of DVR
• Wine - red, white, I don't discriminate
• Candles that smell like Christmas
• Dryer sheets
• Advil, ibuprofen, Tylenol - all the drugs that make my legs work after 13.1 miles
• iPods and their playlists - especially the totally embarrassing songs by Miley Cyrus and Justin Beiber
• Friends - the ones that push me out of my comfort zone, and the ones that catch me afterwards
• Frozen Yogurt
• Delta Gamma - I love the women that are my sisters forever
• My parents - they are always there - enough said
• Blue Moon, Leinenkeugel, Gumballhead....and their friends Bud, Miller, and Coors
• My iPhone - I don't know how I existed before it
• Flip flops

I think that sometimes I forget that the littlest things in life can really make me smile.  These are the things (big or small) that totally make my day.  I'm going to try harder to make sure that I take more time to notice these things.

Who knows - maybe tomorrow there will be another set of things that I <3.  I feel like this should be a never-ending list.

**My apologies to the original blogger....I can't remember where I found you!  Meggie - point it out if you know what I am talking about!

5 Days Until 13.1

That's right.

5 more days until I run the 13.1 miles that I have been training for.  By this time on Saturday night, I'll have 13 more miles on my shoes, a little more soreness in my body, and hopefully a beer in hand.

I waiver between confidence and fear.  I have done this before so I know that I can physically do it.  And despite the fact that I feel like I might not have trained as well as I could have, I know that I did 10 miles 2 weeks ago.

13 isn't that much more than 10....

But there is that sneaky little guy that sometimes lurks in the background of everything I do....he's dark and mysterious and always catches me when I am down.  Self-doubt doesn't hide.  It rears its head whenever I wish it would go far, far away.

I look up to so many runners in my life that do so much more than 13 miles.  I KNOW that I can do this.  If I can cheer them on, I can cheer myself on.

I can do this.

I can do this.

I can do this.

I will do this.

Team in Training - ONE DAY LEFT

That's right - read the title.

I have ONE DAY to complete my fundraising for my half marathon that is happening on October 16th.  I am a tiny $94 dollars away from raising $1100 for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society.

And it is honestly the ONLY reason I am still training for this thing.  I admit it - I probably would have bailed by now if it weren't for the cause.

So help a girl out.  Click this link or the banner to the right and donate a little bit.  Think of the pleasure you'll get from helping find a cure (or just thinking of me work my butt off to complete 13.1 miles - whatever gets you up in the morning!).

Sometimes I don't want to blog.

My first thought when I am sad or upset is not to blog.  If anything, I use it as an excuse to avoid blogging.  As I said a few posts ago, I thought that this area would be my outlet, and it actually became a scarier place than I originally imagined.

But, I promised Nicole so much on my Pursuit of Happyness.  And that included regular blogging.  I think that she is giving me an easy pass on the past two weeks - a lot of pre-user conference blogging in addition to exhaustion - basically she isn't harassing me about the blogging.  (And I appreciate it!).  But here I am.

Back to the point - I'm here tonight, and I don't want to be.

Getting out of the relationship wasn't easy.  Far from it.  But I did it.  And I was okay.  I really was.  But then sometimes I realize that I lost my best friend, in addition to my boyfriend.  And that is so hard.  Some days there are just things that I want to talk about, work through, have someone comfort me on. And who is that person now??  I do feel especially lost at moments like this.  Am I that crazy person that talks to her dogs?  The answer is yes.  But they don't hold my hand, or give me advice, or tell me that it is all going to be okay.  They smile up at me with their loving eyes, and silently wish for me to give them another treat.

But they don't tell me what to do or how to handle things.  So I tell them I am fine.  I tell everyone I am fine.  Because I will be.  I will be just fine by the time tomorrow morning rolls around.

And so on nights like this, I don't want to blog.  I don't want to do anything.  I want to talk to my best friend.

But I blog.  Because that is what this is for.  Because that's why this blog was started.  And because I know that I am not the only person that has felt like this before.

Running Just As Fast As I Can...

So there is still that little thing I am doing.

You know, that half marathon.

In comparison to my friends Katrina and Meggie, my half marathon is nothing.  (To me, they are both super women - people that I truly idolize.)  It is just the tiniest blip on a radar.  But to me, it is ever-looming on my calendar and in my face.  I don't like running.  I especially don't like training runs.  And yet, earlier this summer I decided that signing up for a half marathon was the perfect idea.

What was I thinking??

I was thinking it was good for me.  (It really is.)  I was thinking it was good for a cause. (It really is.)

It doesn't make running any type of distance any better.  At least in my mind.  And I totally get that I am hurting myself because running is 90% mental.  But I still can't help but hate it.

I did 10 miles on Saturday.  I did it and I finished it.  And I am definitely more confident that I can do the half marathon on October 16th. 

But that little voice is still in the back of my head.  Maybe I'll get rid of it by the time the Mini rolls around next May!

Lions & Tigers....& Spiders! Oh my!

In the process of everything that has been going on, I forgot to share that I had one of those "first" experiences that this blog is supposed to be about!  And besides that, this story really shows how much of a scaredy-cat I really am!

The other morning started out normally.  Wake up, walk the pups, shower, get ready for work.  Until I realized that sometime between walking the dogs and getting ready for work, a visitor had arrived in my apartment.  And it wasn't just any visitor...this one had 8 long legs, a disgusting body, and beady little eyes.

A SPIDER HAD ARRIVED.  And he certainly wasn't tiny.  In fact, it might have been the biggest spider I had ever seen.

Needless to say, I freaked out.  I absolutely HATE spiders.  I don't know why, but for as long I can remember they have been one of the things that I am the most scared of.  And for my whole life, someone has always been there to get rid of them.  My dad, my roommates, my boyfriend - all brave souls who made my world spider-free.

But now it's just me.  Tucker and Bobo proved to be useless, as I don't think they even noticed the intruder.  And as I was freaking out, the spider calmly moved to a location I could not reach him.  I missed my chance!  So as I finished getting ready, I would continually check on where I *thought* the spider was.  I was terrified he was poisonous (yes - it was that big), so I googled the first chance I got.  Of course, the images freaked me out, and that journey was short lived.  I am hoping that he escaped out however he got in, and the dogs will scare him from coming back!

So - what does a girl do now?  I don't know!  One of his little friends arrived later that night, and he met immediate death thanks to a good flip-flop.  Hopefully he shouted a warning to others venturing this way.  That should keep them away, right?  I also promptly purchased some Ortho Home Defense.  You'd better believe I stayed up late spraying that stuff.  Try getting in now, suckers.

I'm A DG, She's A DG...

As some of my friends know, I spent the weekend at Purdue.

Nope - I'm not a Boilermaker (how dare you even think that!  DePauw Tigers all the way).  But I am a Delta Gamma....and one of the best things I did after college was become a Recruitment Advisor for the DG Chapter at Purdue.

So once a year I pack a bag and move into the DG house on campus.  It's a weird mix of wonderful college day memories, and a whole lot of feeling old!  Recruitment is intense on a campus as big as Purdue, but I am so lucky because the women there are just phenomenal to work with.

This was, however, the first year that I didn't have someone to watch the dogs as I ventured away to recruit new women into the Greek life.  So, what's a girl do?  Call PetSmart PetsHotel of course!  MY doggy daycare was booked up, so the PetsHotel was my next option.  I was admittedly nervous (because I am so lame) about leaving Bo and Tucker in a new place.  But I dropped them off Friday night and they seemed happy just to get 1000 new things to sniff.

With dogs safely secured, I went off to Purdue.  I spent all night Friday helping decorate for the next day, with all of Saturday spent listening to cheering (I'm a DG, She's a DG....I wanna be a DG, oh yes, oh yes, oh yes I do....).  In between the cheering, I got to count vote after vote.  A late night of recruitment, voting, and conversing with Panhel - only to do it all again on Sunday!

I can't share everything that I do there, but it's admittedly weird to anyone that hasn't experienced the Greek system.  And even though the amount of time in one weekend is exhausting, I love doing it.  I truly love watching the girls in the house start to form relationships with the women that they will invite for membership in just a few short days.  I like being a part of something bigger than myself.  It's strange to think about, but literally every DG chapter on every campus in America goes through the same process....and we all become sisters with this initial bond.

I don't think I ever thought of it this way - not when I was in college, not when I helped run Recruitment at my own house, not even the past few years of advising.  But now that I have taken time to do the things I want to do, I realize that advising is giving me a purpose.  More than being an employee, more than a girlfriend, more than a caregiver.  I get to continue to contribute to something that shaped the woman I became, and influences me to this day.

*Wow - didn't plan on getting that sappy....  I'm sure that there will be plenty of thoughts about that.

Was there drama this past weekend?  Of course.  Did I sleep very little?  Definitely.  Was it totally worth it when I saw the list of women joining the chapter (and of course, the sorority as a whole)?  Without a doubt.  Does it leave me missing my own DG sisters?  Immensely - more than ever.

A little shout-out to my own girls....We are pretty cute DGs, if I do say so myself!